This is a month we tend to focus a lot on love. I want to focus on love today, but not just any love……Self love. I know this isn’t usually the “style” we think of and if you are anything like me you may roll your eyes a bit at the term. One thing that is clear is self-love is the point from which all other love in our lives flow.
One facet of self-love is trusting in the natural ebb and flow of this life. Understanding that you are the one person you will be with forever. You have a guiding force within you that is patient, loving and knows where to go for the greatest expression of your soul.
When we are in total alignment and in total trust of this part of our being we understand that everything is for our greatest good. We can function from a space of gratitude rather than a space of fear when we are in self-love mode. We can see that nothing is in our possession and everything changes, flows, and moves in divine and perfect order.
Self love is a fairly odd concept for our delicate human egos. Our human mind would prefer to avoid, possess, protect and plan rather than trust, release, surrender, and flow. Take time to observe where you may function more from your head space than your heart space. Where can you surrender to more self-love in your life? This isn’t a time to judge and feel like we are doing anything wrong. It is just a time to observe and open up to more guidance to move into love and trust.
One area of love and trust that we tend to get the most hung up on is release. Release requires a tremendous amount of trust to be done with grace. We have to be solid in self-love and know that nothing was “ours” in the first place.
Lets talk about release and the ways we can get stuck in this delicate area.
When it is time to release anything in our lives the turmoil inside is believing we once held something as our own that now has to be released. Everything we feel building up to that moment is the battle between what our mind believes and what is.
Our logical minds find solace in believing that we possess things in our lives. When in fact, everything is fluid and we are bumping into it based on what our souls are guiding us to learn. Based on the current vibration and frequency we operate at. When it is time for us to move on to new beginnings there is a point where we have to come to terms that something must be released in order to let the new in. We must see that the “old”, be it a job, a home, a relationship, or a title was never in our possession to begin with.
There is comfort in believing that because we “have” something we are better off. In turn, there is major discomfort when we believe that if we “lose” something we will somehow be worse off. All of the turmoil is caused by the belief that our lives could get worse.
In the truth and reality of how our universe flows this could never be the truth. We are simply constantly flowing and merging with like vibrations until those vibrations change and we flow to a new space. The connection we had is never truly lost because it was never “ours” to begin with. Another way of looking at is realizing that it will indeed be yours forever. What you were meant to gain from the encounter is always a part of you.
It is that cusp, that breaking point that is the most difficult part emotionally. We are in effect breaking that very, very real illusion of possession and things being static when in-fact, everything flows and everything changes.
We are energetic beings first
When we feel the winds of change we tend to try to think and logic through it, and make the best “choices”. This is another illusion. There is no need for thinking or being logical because it never, ever comes down to logic. It always comes down to what our energy can support. If you have reached the end of an energy path with something there is nothing that can support the frequency needed any longer to attract the two things together. Energetically speaking, if there is no matching vibration there is no attraction keeping the energetic bond together.
Our mental minds can keep us in a holding pattern for a long time after the energy path has been cut off. This is where the angst comes in. We THINK we can force things to get better, be ok, we can suffer through. In the end our souls are just patiently waiting at the end of that path for us to trust that they will lead us to the next.
Mental struggle after the release
Once energetic ties are untangled there is a point where we feel empty. We begin to mentally question what were we thinking?! This is where our mental minds are trying to “save the day”. They know they ultimately have no skin in the game, but really, really don’t want to become unneeded. So they will pull out all the stops and try to fill our minds with every possible scenario of the impending doom coming our way.
The point where we grow
THIS is where we learn to see through the illusion and make the choice to stay grounded and centered. THIS is where we choose to breathe and be still and know that our next journey is unfolding perfectly. Because it can be no other way.
It is important to give ourselves a lot of grace in these moments. We are learning to ignore the big loud voice that gives labels of good and bad right and wrong. We are learning to listen to the quiet voice that is calmly saying “Trust where you are and know that the universe is constantly supporting you in every possible way.” There is no right, wrong, good or bad. In this space we are leaning on self-love.
All about balance
Learning to stay within the energy of the soul is a balancing act. Our minds still need a role to play because we don’t ever “get rid of” our minds, we just learn to make really good friends with it and work together instead of battling one another. The mind needs something to focus on especially when it is feeling most “out of control”. Mentally we want to get out in front of a potential change in order to prevent what “could” happen. This is fear.
When we try to get in front of the wagon to prevent the possible demise or stop the “what ifs” from happening, we are essentially creating the wagon that will mow us over. Functioning from the assumption that it’s all going to be bad if anything changes, we become our own road block. When we do this we disconnect from the possibility that there are unlimited good solutions that could come through if we just stay centered and grounded in self-love and trust.
The best job you can give your mind is to focus on the highest good of everyone involved. Learn to direct your mind to the prayer of surrender. Surrender each moment, each fear, each “what if”. Surrender the need to figure it out.
Be light, observe and laugh
When you notice you are in front of your own wagon gently laugh at yourself. Imagine stepping to the side and sending that wagon rolling down the road all by its self. Get present and surrender. Pay attention to the guidance and messages you are receiving. They are always there.
Release is a necessary part of self-love. If there is something in your life that is ready to be released make that internal shift into self-love and trust. Know that you will be gently guided through the changes that follow. Practice the delicate balance of listening to your soul guidance and soothing your human mind. Above all else trust that all is always in divine and perfect order.